im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
