it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
