I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
This is the high leading the old right now
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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