ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Randomize
