nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
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