Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
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