White coat. Heels.
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
Randomize
