I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Randomize
