that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
Randomize
