Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
He? As in you personified your dick?
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
Fun fact: You might be drunk if your vision is so blurry that you almost ask "do you know where my glasses are?" while you're wearing them.
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