sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
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