it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
there is glitter all over my balls
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Randomize
