There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Randomize
