Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
He really likes Obama...and Bill Clinton too. He said "I mean, how many presidents can say that they got head in the oval office?"
Soulmates.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize