Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
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