Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
Randomize