I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
Pregnant stripper...not hot.
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Randomize
