Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
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