I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
two words: eviction party
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
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