I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize
