That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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