The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
Randomize
