he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
So I'm really hungover walking to work and these douches from comcast on bikes ask if they can take a picture with me to show that they're doing their job. The picture: me, this chick from comcast, i'm holding a 2 ft. pixie stick, a comcast flyer and i'm puking in the parking lot. sounds like their doing a good job!
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
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