The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
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