i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
She texted me and said she was fingering herself. Don't respond to this because she's the perfect girl. I'd love to smell her cell phone after that.
I assume you meant to text someone else on your contact list instead of your own mother...
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
Randomize
