so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
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