Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
Randomize
