She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
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