I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
Sitting in bed reading a porn novel off my phone and accidentally just made Siri start reading the most graphic part aloud. FUN FIRST NIGHT WITH THE NEW ROOMIE.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
Woke up next to my vibrator and a recipe for fudge brownies. If that doesn't scream I NEED TO GET LAID, then I don't know what else could.
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