I murdered the dance floor call the cops
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
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