he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
Randomize
