My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Randomize
