I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
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