yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
Randomize