I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
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