A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
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