Well apparently he's into motor boating.
i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
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