Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
