hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
Randomize
