plz talk dirty to me
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
Randomize
