I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Randomize
