I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
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