nut hugger
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize
