The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
