I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
Randomize
