he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Randomize
