are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
Randomize
