I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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