hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
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