so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
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